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Preparation can be the difference between feeling overwhelmed and feeling empowered. Whether you’re heading into a court hearing, a mediation session, or a full trial, the key to success is being ready, emotionally, mentally, and practically.
Start with Your Lawyer
The first and most important step is to sit down with your lawyer and map out what’s ahead. Understand the format: Will you be testifying? Are there documents you’ll need to bring? Who else will be present? When you know what to expect, you can prepare more intentionally.
Ask your lawyer to walk you through possible questions you may be asked, and don’t be afraid to role-play the parts that make you nervous. The more you practice, the more comfortable and confident you’ll feel.
Get Organized
Legal proceedings are often document-heavy. Your financial affidavit, for example, is a critical piece—and it must be accurate. This includes your income, assets, expenses and liabilities. Make sure it’s up to date and reviewed thoroughly with your attorney. Discovery is also common, especially in contested divorces. Discovery includes turning over/requesting including financial records, emails, texts, and more. Many times it also includes depositions as well. Keeping your records organized in a way that’s easy to access will save time and stress later on.
Focus on What Matters
Judges, mediators and arbitrators aren’t seeing your whole life story. They’re seeing the fraction you present. Your job is to focus on the most relevant and impactful details. Leave out emotional backstory unless it directly supports your case. Stick to facts, timelines, and outcomes.
Remember: this is not the time to get sidetracked by every argument or hurt feeling from the past. Mediation and court are about finding a resolution, not relitigating the entire history of your relationship. Your attorney will guide you as to which historical facts are relevant and will move your theory of the case forward. Trust them.
Take Care of Yourself
The day before your appearance, do something many people overlook: rest. Eat well, get a good night’s sleep, and stay hydrated. Legal proceedings are often long, emotionally draining, and unpredictable. You want to be as calm and clear-headed as possible.
By investing in thoughtful preparation—both with your lawyer and on your own—you’ll walk into the room ready to advocate for yourself and your future.
